People Are Not Measuring Devices
I’ve been feeling rather sorry for Condoleezza Rice lately, and my sympathy has nothing to do with the fact that she will be forever associated with the George W. Bush administration.
I feel sorry for her because so many people want to turn her into a measuring device.
After her speech this past Wednesday at the Republican National Convention, the rhetoric started:
“How can the Democrats claim there is a war on women? Condoleezza Rice proves that’s just propaganda manufactured by liberals who are pandering for women’s votes.”
“Condoleezza Rice demonstrates that any woman can succeed if, instead of relying on the government, she just applies herself.”
While I take issue with those statements, I have no problem with the woman who inspired them. I admire Condoleezza Rice. She’s a smart, accomplished and successful woman. Even though I may not always agree with her politics, I do believe she is a fantastic role model for young woman across our nation.
I just don’t believe that she’s a yardstick .
The notion that all women should measure themselves against Condoleezza Rice, or any other woman, is ridiculous and damaging.
I’ve spent most of my life trying to break my innate tendency to compare myself to other women. I’ve compared my looks, my body, my talents, my personality, my lifestyle and my parenting skills to others. Instead of embracing my unique blend of strengths, weaknesses, quirks and experiences, I simply saw my flaws and failures. I don’t want that for my daughter or for any other female. And I don’t want them to judge women who don’t possess the talent, intelligence or opportunities to achieve what others may define as success.
Yet they are hearing that, because some women have reached the top, all others have to do is simply “try harder.”
That was certainly the message from those who opposed the Lilly Ledbetter Fair Pay Act.
If only working hard were a guarantee of an adequate paycheck and the appropriate recognition. In reality, the workplace is a harsh and very unfair place. I’ve worked hard only to watch those who didn’t zoom right by me. I’ve seen pretty women take advantage of their assets and maneuver their way past others into better jobs and higher paychecks. And I’ve seen the “good old boy” network benefit those who already had the advantage.
While great strides have been made for women in the workplace, the dollars still tell the story. In 2010, the U.S. Census American Factfinder indicates that 17.9% of families with children were living below the poverty level. That number jumped to 39.6 for families with a female head of household. Despite the increase in the number of men who are taking on active parenting and caregiving roles, nothing will ever change the fact that women are the ones who get pregnant and give birth. And now, their ability to even make decisions about that has been under fire by people such as Missouri Congressman Todd Akin, who doesn’t even understand the biology of conception.
Condoleezza Rice has never married nor had children. I have no idea–nor is it any of my business– whether this was a conscious decision or just the result of the many choices she made throughout her life. I do know that she never had to make arrangements for child care, leave work early to pick up her child at school or miss important meetings when a child was sick.
And I’ve never heard anyone claim that she was an underachiever or compare her to women who have careers and children.
But maybe that’s because some yardsticks are defective and only measure what the user wants them to show.
Posted on September 3, 2012, in current affairs, perspective, Politics, Uncategorized and tagged equality, fair pay, feminism, feminist, news, opinion, politics, women. Bookmark the permalink. 14 Comments.
You made some great points there Trina. It’s good to get perspective on these things 😉
Thanks so much!
You know, men have had so many traditional ways of measuring up against each other – particularly sports, GPAs, paychecks. Women have had fairly few of those, relatively speaking – I wonder how this serves to warp the yardstick a little more, the amorphous nature of traditional roles….
Good point… but the question is, why is our culture so obsessed with measuring up?
Wonderful post, Trina.
As I read the various articles on Ms. Rice and her speech, I had very similar thoughts. I heard about how she was clearly just “prepping for 2016” (from the left), and how “She proves that Republicans support women’s equality.” (from the right) and “What awful lipstick!” (from the idiots.)
Thanks for another reminder that we don’t have to keep measuring ourselves, and that we hall have different experiences and opportunities.
The lipstick comments remind me of all the debate during Sarah Palin’s painful campaign. Sadly, as long as women must face judgement about such things, we still on a different playing field than men.
The older you get the less you worry about measuring up – I am more content with who I am, how I look than I have ever been before. I guess you begin to accept yourself and even like yourself more as you move through your life!!!
And you are my role model and hero, Betty!
Bravo for picking out the subtle rhetoric. I do admire Condoleeza, but get rid of that yardstick! There are many pathways to a successful and fulfilling life.
And each of us should be allowed to develop our own definition of successful and fulfilling.
I’m so proud of my daughter Amy, she has gained her success as an attorney with hard work and dedication, and has made her own definition of fulfilling. Well stated! Can’t wait to to see you when we go to hear Maya Angelou in Charleston!!!
Can’t wait to see you either! (And you should be very proud of Amy!)
Once again you have writen a great article. I love Condoleeza also. She is a great inspiration. Let’s get rid of the yard stick and use the much more flexible tape measure. If you turn it around in the middle it is the same on both ends!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOL